So much to say!

Man, I have been busy the last several days. I've had so much to write about, but didn't have the time or energy to do it until now. And I am not sure which thing to start with.

I guess I will start with the most recent and work backwards since tonight is still fresh on my mind.

Tonight was the Team in Training pasta party for the runners competing in the Austin AT&T marathon tomorrow. I was the guest speaker for the event and I have to say it went really well. I expanded and rewrote my speech and was able to deliver it comfortably and I felt like I really reached people. There were about 150 people there; runners and coaches and families, at the Radisson Hotel downtown. Dinner was designed for the runners, two kinds of pasta and grilled chicken breast. I sure could have used a glass of wine, but I don't think they recommend that for runners the night before the marathon. Probably better that I not drink drying wine before speaking anyway, seeing as last time I spoke I had a dry mouth issue.


I wore my tiara and sash, but the gown I was hoping to wear didn't work out. I borrowed this gorgeous red flowy gown from Ramona's. The pic doesn't do it justice, you can't see the sparkly rhinestones all over the bodice. When I tried it on there, the zipper was broken and Ronni was so kind as to put in a new zipper. I suspected that with a fixed zipper I wouldn't be able to zip it up, but I brought it home anyway to try. The bodice is very, very fitted just under the bosom and my rib cage is simply too wide for it. It just wouldn't go. Even if I didn't eat for a week, I doubt it would fit. David tried to help me zip it, but it was a no go. Perhaps with another person we could have gotten it, but I decided if it takes two people and removing a rib to get a dress to zip, it wasn't meant to be. It is gorgeous though and exactly the gown I am looking for to wear as the chemo queen. My heart is broken...**sniff sniff***


Instead I wore the awesome vintage blue-lace cocktail dress that I wore in Barefoot in the Park. Of course like idiots we left our camera at home so we don't have any good pictures of the event. Andrea' took this with her camera phone.

I went ahead and wore the wig. I have been trying to find a tiara that is small enough to fit my head without the wig. But I must have a tiny head, cause everything I have tried is too big. And I don't have enough hair yet for the combs to work. A few more months and I should be able to use a bobby pin or something. But tonight, I wore the wig, even though I would rather not. I love the wig, but it feels too much like a crutch to me at this point. Like pretension. I have half an inch of hair and it looks decent. I am not Britney Spears that I have to wear wigs and greasy hair extensions to pretend I have hair. I wonder what she would look like if she just cut it out and wore her hair short, whatever length it is. It would probably look better. Poor girl, what a mess.

Why am I off on a Britney Spears tangent? Huh?

What I should be writing about is how a ballroom full of people listened to my story tonight and were right there with me so much that as I spoke, most of them were tearing up, like me. And when I finished the room stood as one and clapped. I got a standing ovation and it meant more to me than any of the ovations I have gotten over the years on stage. This was different. What a warm, wonderful group of people, so many touched, no, burned, by cancer. And I was able to reach them and we all cried together when the emcee got up after I spoke and asked for a moment of silence to honor those who have fought cancer and won, and those who didn't make it. It was a pretty damned emotional and I was so proud to have been a part of it.

I have no idea if I will ever be asked to speak like that again, but I am glad I did it. So many people came to me afterwards and gave me a hug and just told me that they were inspired. I met other survivors who are running tomorrow. And I am invited to hang out at a couple of water stops tomorrow. I will probably get up at the crack of dawn to head downtown to cheer the Team In Training runners on. Should be fun.

I also did my callback audition this afternoon for Stop Kiss. It went well. I read some scenes better than others and as usual I feel I could have done better in some things. But am satisfied overall with how it went. And I really don't envy the director. There were eight women vying for two parts and seriously, the director could cast it any number of ways. Everyone was good and everyone was different in some way. Usually when I leave an audition I can say with confidence who I would cast if I were the director. This time, damn, I just don't know. I don't think she can go wrong whatever she decides. I should know Monday some time whether I am cast or not.

And I have cool news on the NYC trip that is rapidly approaching! I can't remember if I mentioned in the last blog that we are confirmed to be in the indoor studio audience of Good Morning America on Thursday morning next week. And that is cool enough. But Friday I got a call from Letterman! I won an online lottery for tickets to the show, but had to answer a question about the show to win them. I was in the shower when they called, so before I called back, I googled the Late Show website to brush up on facts. I was sure I wouldn't know the answer since I don't watch as often as I used to. But the question was easy - What color is the announcer's hair? Red! I actually think I knew that one before I googled! So we will be in the studio audience of Letterman on Thursday night! So watch GMA and Letterman on Thursday the 21st and look for me and David.


What else? Valentine's Day! Jackson had a big day Thursday. At school they decorated little goody bags for valentine's and all the moms/dads sent a treat for the kids. The grocery store was out of the little boxes of cards for kids so I bought a package of stickers and some little rattle favors and made them up for each kid. My first mommy preschool project! I was feeling ok about it until Thursday afternoon when I picked him up and saw what some of the other moms had done. Little cellophane bags full of treats and cool things. Man. I don't want to start this mommy competition crap in preschool. So I am gonna let it go that what I did wasn't as cool as what some other moms did. I will not compete, hear me, self? I will not compete!

When I took him to school that morning he got really clingy when we got there. He wanted me to carry him and he didn't want to be put down in his classroom. He cried a little and told me "no, no!" I was afraid he was going to have a melt-down and I didn't understand. He talked about school all morning and said he wanted to go, and when we got there he wasn't happy. But then a couple of the other kids came up and took him by the arm and dragged him off to play. Little girls, of course. And he kind of threw me a look over his shoulder like, "Ok, I guess I'll stay." He quit crying immediately and lost all interest in me. I had to take him by the shoulders to get his attention to say I was leaving. He didn't care. So I guess he is a little apprehensive about school, but enjoys it anyway.


Thursday evening, Mom and Tonya brought over the car bed Tonya has been building for the last several months. She worked so hard on it and boy is it gorgeous! Jackson loves it. We don't have a twin mattress for it yet, but he was so excited and wanted to sleep in it right away. So we pulled the mattress out of the crib and piled pillows around it to make up for the gap so he could go ahead and sleep in it. We'll get a twin mattress tomorrow afternoon, I hope. If we can track down a truck to use and it isn't raining too much.


Did I cover everything? Speech, callback, valentine suburban mom thing, car bed, Letterman and GMA? I think that is all.

Send NYC restaurant recommendations if you have them! We are leaving Wednesday bright and early.